I sat down today to take out all of my frustrations on a keyboard. I poured out my frustrations to my best friend in an email...and deleted it. I poured out my frustrations in a blog post...and deleted it. I struggle with taking off the happy face mask and being real with people when things seem to be falling apart. Sure, nothing major is wrong...but between fires and disappointments and frustrations and broken vehicles and broken friendships and finances and....after awhile the list gets longer and seems pettier. And if I sit down and let the world read that, or even my best friend, I feel like the only thing I have done is show weakness as a "good Christian who always trusts God and smiles through every situation." So the dilemma...where does one turn when she just wants to scream she is so frustrated....
And the obvious answer..is God. Though he already knows the hardships we are facing, He's been waiting for me to come to Him. So while I spent half of this day wondering who I could share with...my Savior has been waiting. And no keyboard, or person, or blog...can come close to the weight that is lifted off of my shoulders after a long talk with Him.
How Can I Keep from Singing? - Chris Tomlin
There is an endless song
Echoes in my soul
I hear the music ring
And though the storms may come
I am holding on
To the rock I cling
How can I keep from singing Your praise
How can I ever say enough
How amazing is Your love
How can I keep from shouting Your name
I know I am loved by the King
And it makes my heart want to sing
I will lift my eyes
In the darkest night
For I know my Savior lives
And I will walk with You
Knowing You'll see me through
And sing the songs You give
How can I keep from singing your praise? How can I ever say enough, how amazing is your love? How can I keep from shouting your name? I know I am loved by the king, and it makes my heart want to sing
I can sing in the troubled times
Sing when I win
I can sing when I lose my step
And fall down again
I can sing 'cause You pick me up
Sing 'cause You're there
I can sing 'cause You hear me, Lord
When I call to You in prayer
I can sing with my last breath
Sing for I know
That I'll sing with the angels
And the saints around the throne
how can i keep from singing your praise how can i ever say enough how amazing is your love how can i keep from shouting your name? I know I am loved by the king and it makes my heart, I am loved by the king and it makes my heart, I am loved by the king and it makes my heart want to sing
2 comments:
Venting your frustrations is a way to release those frustrations so you can refocus and in no way implies that you are lacking in faith. You and Blu are doing amazing things for the people of Zambia and have always put God first and trusted him. God teaches us through our trials and I am sure there is something good that will come out of these setbacks. Carry on and God bless your entire family.
God also calls us to bear one another's burdens! And while there is always discretion in what you share, we can't (help)bear your burdens if we don't know what they are!
It's always a fine line in the mission community of what to share or not...but over and over again we were told how much people appreciated our honesty and felt much more enabled to intercede for us!
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